


Fan Fiction

by SRassier



Category: The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Diego...not so much, International Fanworks Day 2020, Klaus is pumped, The Hargreeves learn what slash is, fan fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:54:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22513573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SRassier/pseuds/SRassier
Summary: Five gets a computer. He stumbles upon an Umbrella Academy fan fiction site. All the siblings get a taste of what the world wants them to be.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 108





	Fan Fiction

**Author's Note:**

> My entry for International Fanworks Day 2020.
> 
> It's a little longer than a drabble, but I have a hard time writing anything less than 1,000 words so I think I did a pretty good job editing it down.

“Do you know what I can do with this?” Five marveled at the machine in front of him.   
Klaus lifted his head off his hand where he was resting it and suggested, “Porn?”  
Ben rolled his eyes and Five dismissed the comment all together. “I can keep all my theories and equations here. I can reach out to others in the scientific community. I can post papers without anyone having to think they are coming from some teenager.” 

He went about setting up his new laptop. He made sure to put a password on it to keep Klaus and his porn away from his precious new possession. He connected to the internet and just sat there, staring at the screen. “I don’t know where to start.” His shoulders slumped as he looked at the screen, wondering what the hell ‘Google’ meant.

Allison came into the kitchen and found Five staring at the laptop and rest of her siblings staring at Five. “Hey guys, what’s up?”  
Vanya filled her in. “Five got a computer and the internet but now he doesn’t know where to start so…he’s broken.”  
“Whenever I get bored, I google myself.”  
Klaus clapped his hands together. “I told you…porn.”  
“No, idiot. Google is a search engine. You type whatever you want to find out about, and it shows you sites. Here.” She walked around the table next to Five and reached over to the keyboard, typing the words: ‘Allison Hargreeves.’ She hit enter and stepped back to let Five take over. 

He watched as Google spit out hundreds of sites about Allison’s movies, her personal life, gossip, and biographies. “Holy shit.” Five mumbled.  
“I know right?”  
“This is a bit creepy.”  
“You think that’s creepy, don’t search for Fan fiction.” Nearly the whole room turned to look at her. “What? You never heard of fan fiction?” Met with blank stares, she sighed. “It’s when people take a property, like a movie or a tv show or comic book and write stories based on those characters.”  
“Why would they do that when they can just watch the movie?” Diego asked from the corner of the room where he was pretending not to be interested.  
“It’s sort of like getting to continue the story the way you want, and have the characters act the way you think they should have.”  
Vanya piped in, “what’s so creepy about that? I think it’s nice.”  
“Yeah, when it stays fan FICTION. It’s when they start writing about real people that I’m not totally behind.”  
“They write about real people…like you?” Luther’s face twisted at the thought of Allison reading a story with her as the main character doing, God knows what.  
“Yeah, I mean it’s harmless, but some of the shit people write can get downright uncomfortable.”

Five’s eyes were as wide as saucers as he stared at the screen, no longer listening to his siblings talk about the ups and downs of fan fiction. Klaus finally noticed that he was no longer ‘with’ them and silenced his siblings with a furious wave of his hand. “You ok buddy?”

Five merely shook his head and twisted the laptop so it was facing Klaus. He looked at what got Five so shook and when he registered what it was, he let out a great, big, belly laugh. “Is this real?”  
“What?” Allison ran to look over his shoulder and her jaw dropped.   
Five explained, “I typed ‘Allison Hargreeves fan fiction.”  
“This is awesome.” Klaus beamed, receiving a slap on the side of the head from Allison.  
“What is it?” Diego finally giving his full attention to the scene.  
Klaus finally let it spill. “There is an Umbrella Academy fan fiction site!”

Suddenly the laptop became the most interesting thing in the whole world to seven people. They all crowded around the table as Five started scrolling through the site, reading titles and summaries out loud to the others. “There’s a lot of action stories, different versions of us fighting the Eiffel Tower, capturing and being captured by Dr Terminal, that sort of thing.”  
Klaus pointed at the screen. “Here, click on the filters button.”  
Five clicked and read aloud the choices to his family. “Language, rating, characters… relationships?” His brow furrowed as he clicked to look at the drop-down menu. “Allison and Luther,” Luther blushed, and Allison’s eyes immediately dropped to the floor. “Allison and Diego, Allison and Klaus,” He smirked as he saw Klaus wrinkle his nose. “Allison and Five…” He looked up at her and winked. “What’s slash? It’s asking me if I want to include slash in my search.”  
“NO!” Allison shouted.   
Five looked up at her then back down at the mouse. “Slash it is!”

“Holy shit!” He giggled; the 58-year-old man giggled like the school boy that he resembled.   
Klaus grabbed the computer and turned it so he could look. “Oooh, Klaus and Diego. I’m going to read that!”   
“What?!” Diego grabbed at the computer and spun it to face him.  
Five yelled at him, “Easy with that!”  
Diego ignored him as he began to read, “Diego is angry after a failed mission and Klaus is determined to take his mind off things…even if it takes all night…I’m gonna be sick.”  
“Hey,” Klaus spat, “You could do worse.”

Five took back the laptop and continued. “Klaus and Ben, Diego and Ben, Diego and Five.” Another wink was sent across the table. “Five and Margaret? Who’s Margaret?”  
No one seemed to know so Five read the summary. “This is a story I decided to write about that girl who sometimes shows up by Reginald Hargreeves’ side while the others are on a mission. I don’t know much about her, but she fascinates me, so I named her Margaret and here is a story about her and Five’s undying love for each other.” Five looked across the table at a very embarrassed Vanya. “Well, you always thought no one noticed you, but you were wrong…Margaret.”

The rest of the afternoon was spent reading and laughing at the different reactions they all had to various stories and pairings. Even Diego seemed to loosen up when he realized how many women were truly just fan-girling over him. At one point even declaring, “I got to meet this Mary Sue chick.” Causing Allison to nearly fall off her chair laughing. Five finally resigned to close the laptop when they all decided to go grab some dinner, but not before creating his very first bookmark.


End file.
